{on my heart and mind...}

I think a lot of me being a horrible blogger is that when I comes down to it, I'm somewhat a very personal person. I have never looked at it that way, but a lot of times I find myself saying, does the whole world need to know these things or my feelings? I realize, though, that a lot of what we feel can be related to by those around us.

Truth is there is a lot weighing on my heart and mind... And, today I'm going to share a little bit of my heart. I'm still completely exhausted from our very sick week last week with Avery.. so this may turn into a bit of a ramble.

I've realized over the past days and weeks that I've become quite the worry wart. I don't know where this comes from it is not me and I don't want it to become me.... I mean okay, I admit, that I am a worry wart when I don't feel well and I always think the worst is wrong with me. (And for some reason I've been so bad about it this past year.) But, aside from that I feel like I have started to stress and worry over other things that I have no control over. And, I'm realizing that its causing me anxiety, and that is not needed. On top of it all, there is a situation so close to my heart that needs PRAYER. So, I beg you to pray. I have to just let any fear, anxiety or worry I have go... and realize that God has me right in the palm of his hand. That alone is so comforting.

Our pastor read this version of Phillipians 4: 6-7 a few weeks back from the message bible. I can't tell you how much I felt like he was yelling it right to me.

Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.
This is now my constant prayer.

A friend on FB shared this verse a few days back and once again I felt like it was meant just for me.

I love the Lord because He hears my prayers and answers them. Because He bends down and listens, I will pray as long as I breathe! Psalm 116:1-2

xoxo,
K

{kindergarten}

Yes, the past five and a half years of my life just flashed by me.



My babygirl is a big kindergarten student. We've been excited. We've looked forward and all of a sudden it was the day.



As my sleepy head woke up this morning it was so cute, she stumbled down the hall with groggy eyes. (her mother's child). I couldn't help but smile. We made her lunch as she sat on the kitchen counter. She refused anything to eat for breakfast. (Again, her mother's child). She had the biggest smile. We quickly got her dressed. As we went through our new morning routine I thought back on all her "baby" days. I remember when this day seemed so far away. And today we live it.













We got to school a few minutes early and had to wait in the cafeteria, that was torture for her. As the bell rang, we then made our way to her ladybug classroom.

She walked along with daddy and baby sissy a little ahead of me. I smiled. I didn't cry! This is going to be such a fun adventure for her.



We made it to her classroom and tucked her things away in her cubby.



Found her seat.



We didn't linger long. A little pep talk and a kiss goodbye. This is when baby sissy lost it. She was pitiful and cried as we left D there as we walked out.



and one last glance..... my sweet girl.





Its 9:37 and baby sissy is sleeping soundly. We can't wait to pick D up today and hear all about her very first day.

{wordless wednesday:: rainbow}

Remember me?????????? Anyone???? :)

Not sure if I can stay wordless on this one.... I mean can you say beautiful???

Friday evening, we endured one of our typical summer storms. I had to reschedule a session, and somehow I had to get us out for something to eat. About an hour passed and the rain stopped, so the girls and I loaded up to go straight to the grocery store and home. When I stepped out in the driveway I looked up to the most beautiful rainbow and gorgeous sunlight. It literally was breathtaking. It stopped me in my tracks. As we drove a little ways the brighter it got. A full, bright, double rainbow! We drove around a few blocks and I decided to let the girls get out and take a (few) pictures. For a split second, I thought "you should have brushed their hair.." and quickly I realized no matter what this was picture perfect. They were in awe and it turned into a sweet little memory for us. ♥ See....














It seems rainbows have been in abundance lately. With all the storms, so many rainbows. Each and every rainbow reminds me of God's promise and I don't find that its 'by chance' that I see them on the days I need to be reminded the most.



So, the next time you see a rainbow, think of Noah and the flood. Remember that God loves you, and that no matter how bad the storm, there will always come a bright new day.

That is God's promise, and God always keeps his promises.

a new year: a time for refreshment

I'm not sure what it is about a new year that brings such a refreshing feeling. I guess its the year end that closes a chapter of life and opens a new one. We feel like we can start fresh, turn a new page... It seems to me that everyone is so rushed to leave the low points behind. Trust me, I can relate to that... but we are put in those low points to learn and to grow.

That's just want 2009 was to me. A year of learning and growing, along with much sadness and burden. It was also a year of happiness and being blessed, even through the difficult times.

Brad and I always chuckle at 'new years resolutions' -- we just don't do them. But, I do like to set some goals. I'm going to share a few of mine personally..

It is my desire in this new year:
to share more of my heart.
to not worry about what others think.
to love despite being hurt.
to forgive easily.
to be an encouragement.
to be a refreshment to others.
that Jesus be seen through me.
to let go of things beyond my control and know that HE is in control.
to lay my burdens down.
to worry less and lean on Him.
to pray without ceasing.
to be bold.

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18

{wordless wednesday}

First ... I have a few words... yes, Thanksgiving has come and gone and I've meant a hundred times to come and update from my very thankful heart. I feel so incredibly blessed at where I am in my life. I plan to post my thanksgiving post at the end of the year when I reflect on where we've been and where we are...

for now... my little loves... captured by my friend, Dana!

{wordless wednesday:: }

This photo of my girls says something to me. It shows me that life is simple, sweet and fun. It spells happiness. Life is crazy and life is busy... and this photo tells me to smile, relax and simply continue to love my babies!

{i don't know how ya'll do it...}

I want to be a good blogger. I think of a million things to share with whoever happens to read my blog, BUT-- I just don't know where ya'll find the time!

For crying out loud, the last blog I posted resulted in my walls being colored with red sharpie marker by baby sissy as I blogged her birthday post... I don't know if my house can handle much more of that!! Shhhh, right now she is sleeping!!

Paint suggestions?? :)

I'll be back sooner than later, hopefully!

{new york!}

It's about time I share with you all a little of New York.

We woke up early Thursday morning. Of course, I woke up a little earlier than B because I am the type of girl who can't shower the night before and get up, get dressed, and feel good all day long. I need that hot shower to wake up and get moving. Our flight was an early one! I quickly got dressed in my excitement. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't just a little nervous about boarding the plane. I'm also a girl who likes to know what to expect. So new experiences usually make me a little antsy. I'd also be lying if I said I didn't almost cry as I went and kissed my girls in the middle of their comfortable sleep. But, we were quickly on our way.

We arrived at the airport with plenty of time to check in and get through security checkpoints. There was a little delay at baggage check in due to some flight changes that had taken place, but after a few minutes that was all figured out as well.

We didn't have a window seat on the flight up. I was a little anxious about that.. I really wanted a window seat.. I needed to see what was going on! When we boarded I was excited to see that the window seat was still vacant. I quickly plopped down in it and prepared to have to beg to stay there. Much to my surprise the guy frequent flier who held the ticket to that seat could have cared less.

Our flight was great. I didn't even panic like I expected myself to. Well maybe once, when we almost had a delay on the runway because of air traffic in Atlanta, which would have meant we would miss our connection to New York. Instead we had 15 minutes to change planes and had to run through the airport to make our next flight. Have to keep things exciting right? Up above the clouds...



Our landing in New York was a little bumpy. I didn't have much to compare it to, but much rougher than the first... so I was excited to just get off and make our way into the city!!

We jumped in a cab and took off.. Just like we had planned. We had no agenda on this trip. Just to get there and go where the city took us and to enjoy every minute of it!

Just a FEW of my thoughts on NY:
*we are already planning our next visit!
*you must be ready to walk - and walk fast!
*visiting ground zero will give you a totally different feeling about 9/11...
*cab rides are more scary than flying
*you won't lack a starbucks - there is one on every corner - and there is a reason they are there... you need the coffee to keep up!
*NY style pizza is delicious!
*it is the place to shop
*the subway is confusing!
*the city never sleeps!
*there really are food vendors lined up and down the streets
*it is noisy- cab horns really do honk 24/7... ok maybe just 22/7.
*don't talk on your cell phone and try to cross the street.. you will almost be hit.
*if you walk past a "statue" on the ferry.. chances are it's a live statue.
*a picture with elmo will cost you $1.
*dancing on the big piano will make you feel like a big kid!
*the city at night is... breathtaking!
*central park is beautiful.. you need a full day just to spend there!
*times square= fun.. even if you just sit and people watch
*Chinatown is just something you have to experience. you come away with great purses, too!


Many of you had asked was there a special occasion for this trip and the answer is no. We've both always wanted to visit New York and we as mommy and daddy were much overdue for an "us" vacation. We've never gone anywhere without the girls and we rarely even leave them anywhere overnight. We had decided that the city would be the perfect destination for our get-a-way.

I can't even begin to post all the photo's I took on this trip so I created a slideshow. (It's fairly long - I'm sorry - I couldn't help myself). And this is only a portion, but it hits the highlights of our trip! May have to post more later!




We are already planning our next trip.

{remembering 9/11}

It's hard to believe its been eight years.

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I remember the day like yesterday. It's all so clear in my mind. I was in my car, sitting at the red light in town right infront of McDonalds. News came across the radio... I couldn't believe what I was hearing. That day forever changed the hearts of ever American.

It was so different to be in New York last week and visiting Ground Zero. Brad and I spent a lot of time there. I can't even begin to describe the feelings being there stirred up in me, the emotions.



We walked down the street and imagined what the people of New York witnessed that day. The shock, the horror, the sadness. I mean what would you do if you were walking down the street on any ordinary morning and a plane flew into the building you were possibly about to walk into? The your husband, wife, family member or friend could be in? If you got a phone call from your husband who was on a plane that was highjacked?



We were able to even talk with some New York residents, they shared stories and information. I still get chills. I heard over and over, this is not the same city it was before 9/11/01. "This changed the attitude of the city, of the people here.."





I feel like their just aren't adequate words to even describe. I'll never forget the most tragic day our nation has ever seen.

{leavin' on a jet plane}

Yes, for the first time in my 27 years I'm going to board an airplane. (A little pathetic isn't it?? but true!). B and I leave for NYC early in the morning. I am so excited that I haven't had the time to think about being anxious, but I'm sure that time will come in the morning as I'm moving through security checkpoints!

I also haven't had the time to think about being childless for a little over 3 days. I know my girls will be in wonderful hands, so I'm not nervous about that. BUT, I've only ever left them overnight less than a handful of times. So, yes this trip is overdue and I'm really excited about it. But, you mommy's know how it is... I know I'm going to miss them terribly. I only hope they miss me half as much!! :)

Please pray for our safe travels and that I don't panic when our plan hits the runway. I'm only half kidding!

Talk to you all soon!

{can i run and hide?}

I'm having one of those mommy moments.
(Chime in here and tell me you have them, too!)

i'm blessed that my children are very rarely sick aside from the common cold or "bug" going around
so when I collapsed into bed last night I really hoped (i prayed!) that this morning would be better than our night
it wasn't
you see, Delaney has landed herself a urinary tract infection.
poor baby
so that explains her irritability, the mysterious fever last week, and the nightly accidents
(i mean i think her sheets may fall apart from washing them so much- thank goodness for plastic mattress covers)

so back to yesterday.
enough was enough. another accident. another load of laundry.
i called the dr. and I wasn't going to let them tell me that we weren't coming in.
i was 99% sure it was a uti.
we've done this once before.
thankfully, they wanted a sample.
so i throw our things together
jump in the shower
load them up and we're off

i didn't have time to find a sitter for avery
and she needs a nap
proves to be a disaster
load delaney up with fluids
and halfway there she declares she needs to "go" and bad
i talk her through it
the better thing about it this time is she's potty trained and she can 'tinkle' (as my grandmother would say) in the cup
she does her thing
we wait for the dr.
in the meantime I'm sure the office thought our room contained a bunch of caged animals.
the girls fought over who was going to sit in my lap
i must have said no no a million times to keep avery off the scales
the diagnosis is just as i thought
a uti and antibiotics for 10 days.

the problem now...
the medicine tastes bad and its not pink
it took 30 minutes last night to give her one dose
this morning even worse
after wrestling with her like a pro wrestler
she spit it back out
exhausted, we were both in tears
she just won't take it
she won't drink it mixed with ANYTHING
she doesn't care that i tell her she'll be getting shots if she doesn't just take the medicine
she doesn't seem to care that she's not out playing with the neighborhood kids right now because she won't simply just take the medicine
she's a strong willed four and a half year old
i'm all out of ideas
i'm tired
and I just want her to feel better!

and for the sake of my sanity, why can't they make grape or bubblegum flavored antibiotics?!

what quarter of the game are you in?

...in the game of life.

This illustration was used at our dear friends funeral just a few short weeks ago. It's been at the front of my mind ever since and I've had the urge to share it here for days...

Most every teenager or young person would think "I'm in the pre-game", "I'm in the 1st quarter"... others may see themselves resting at "halftime". But, the honest truth is we don't know what part of the game we are playing. We will probably never know why God chose to take John at that moment, at such a young and monumental time of his life. But God has a reason for everything he does even when we don't understand.

No one would have ever imagined that at the young age of 22, at a time that it seemed his life was just getting started that John was in the 4th quarter. I know it was a shock to me but not to God. I think we often lose sight of who's in control. The truth is we aren't in control, God is. We may think we'll live forever, but we may not. I know you never want to think of those situations but its the truth. We aren't promised tomorrow and I'm so thankful to know I have a God who loves me and has my very best interest at heart with every breath he gives me.